Thursday, January 22, 2009

My mom says it’s gonna be a bad year...

And I suppose I should believe her, it’s just the whole thing about “my glass being half full”, I guess. She should know though, she’s had her fair share of bad years, more than her fair share, if you ask me. This came right after they had to put Grover down last Monday.

It might seem silly to someone that doesn’t have pets, or doesn’t care for cats, but losing Grover a week ago was harder than I thought it would be. He was 17 years old, and very much a huge part of my Grandma’s life, especially when she needed both Grover and Gina the most. Then they were my cats, I had every intention of taking them with me, where ever that was going to be. But they had been through quite a bit and moving them wasn’t going to be fair. Then they were my parent’s cats and had a very full, warm lapped life. It’s just hard to lose someone/something you love, even though I know he’s better off now.

Also, cancer is a bitch. Uncle Mike, Cindy, Rick Edwards, were all diagnosed in 2008. Mr. Edwards didn’t make it, and I’m not going to write about that here, I don’t feel like I can do it eloquently enough. Besides, if you were at his memorial, you know what it meant to lose him. I found out yesterday that the prognosis isn’t what it had been for both my Uncle Mike and Cindy. I’m not going into details here, I’m sure I wouldn’t get them right anyway, I don’t even know most of them. I do know it doesn’t mean anyone is giving up or losing hope. The point is that it pisses me off – it’s existence, itself. As it does anyone who’s been affected by cancer, which is everyone.

Apparently my Grandpa has decided that it’s better to be in bed all day. I can’t really blame him, he’s 94 years old, I just wish he felt better is all, really.

There was a round of layoffs at work. I made it, as did most people. But for eight other people, I hope they had a good Christmas.

Oh yeah, my ex brother-in-law is an idiot. Really, a plain idiot with no regard for anyone else. I won’t go into details (Barry may want to at some point), other than he’s hurting people I care about for no other reason than his disregard. I think the worst part might be that he actually thinks he cares about others – puts them before himself. What?

And now for the little stuff – that you’re not supposed to sweat, but I am for now anyway – I have a never ending pimple on my chin and I spent a week (most of anyway) completely back on program with Weight Watchers, only to gain .6 lbs.

It’s only January. See why I was afraid of being “mean”?

Sorry – this blog wasn’t meant to be a sad place, and I’m sure in Barry’s eyes it should include some useful information (and just might from time to time). For now though, I’m sure you’ll excuse me for using it for venting. The glass full part though? I have the most amazing husband. He loves me for every part of me… and I love him for the same reasons. I am part of this amazing network of people I truly care for and them for me. My family are my friends, and my friends are my family. Not everyone gets to say that.

1 comment:

Holly said...

I left a comment - I know I did...but it's not here! I can't re-create the message, but please know I have a ready ear and shoulder if you need one.

What a difficult week it must have been for you! I want cancer - and pain (emotional and physical)- banished in 2009! And while I'm at it, let's banish the "idiot" you mentioned!

Hang in there, sweetie - I'm so glad you are friend AND family!!
Love you much -
(Holly) Mom